What is a People Pleaser other than someone who is trying to gain control of their own emotions and self-worth? - but by doing it through another person. (aka: co-dependence) They need another person to make them feel whole inside.
Peer pressure can be a powerful thing, and it can work both ways - for good and for bad.
I seem to have an abundance of insecure people in my life. Not just a little insecure, but life-altering, crippling insecurity - to the point where they make really bad decisions regarding other people. (Yes, sometimes me). I have never understood this type of behavior. But some things that I have noticed are these:
1. You cannot control your fears (and that's where insecurity stems from) by controlling other people. It does not work, and inevitably ends up alienating those around you.
2. If you have really low self-esteem, the quickest way to build yourself up is by knocking someone else down. And while this may make you feel good temporarily, it makes the other person feel like crap - and in the long run will cause separation.
These people often feel like they are in hell, or living hell. I wonder how much truth there is to that.
Hell is defined as separation from God. And since God is in ultimate control, when we try to wrestle that away from Him, are we not separating ourselves from Him? - in essence creating our own hell.
The only person we should be trying to please is God.
Control is an illusion.
When you care more about yourself than others, no matter how you try to justify it, you are being selfish - and selfishness will get you nothing but hell.
Learn to let go.
Let go of the fear and insecurity.
Let go of the control.
Let go of your own expectations of life, and seek what God's expectations are.
Only there will you find true peace and comfort.
Love thy neighbor. Don't put them down or tell them what to do. Let God be in charge of them.
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